


Never Again

by PocketPrompto



Category: Final Fantasy XV
Genre: Humor, M/M, Nyx Ulric Appreciation Week, NyxUlricWeek2020, Prompto is their adopted son
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-21
Updated: 2020-06-21
Packaged: 2021-03-04 06:15:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 926
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24845170
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PocketPrompto/pseuds/PocketPrompto
Summary: Nyx has lived in Insomnia for about ten years now and he likes to think that he’s gotten over the initial shock of living and breathing in an entirely new country and living an entirely new lifestyle.But some days, Insomnia really tests him.
Relationships: Cor Leonis/Nyx Ulric
Comments: 17
Kudos: 72





	Never Again

**Author's Note:**

> Day 3 of Nyx Ulric Appreciation Week!  
> Prompt: Culture Shock
> 
> (Shout out to the discord for helping me come up with this abomination )
> 
> NOW WITH WONDERFUL FANART FROM THWIPPERSNAPPLE!  
> Follow them [here](https://twitter.com/Thwippersnappl1)  
> and check out the art [here!](https://twitter.com/Thwippersnappl1/status/1275206957305958400?s=20)

Nyx has lived in Insomnia for about ten years now and he likes to think that he’s gotten over the initial shock of living and breathing in an entirely new country and living an entirely new lifestyle. 

But some days, Insomnia really tests him.

“What the  _ fuck _ is a deep fried cheese covered peanut butter and jelly sandwich?” Nyx asks, his tone dripping with disgust. 

Cor snorts, but Prompto lights up and gestures to one of the giant stands that was serving said heart attack on a plate.

“That’s fair food, dude!” he beams and then inhales dramatically through his nose.

Nyx is tempted to cover it because he’s pretty sure the smell alone would clog their arteries. In fact, most of the foods here would likely take a fairly healthy person out in one bite. Here being the yearly Insomnia City fair, where the King and Prince could mingle with their citizens and pose for a few photo ops at a game of Chocobo Toss or Whack-a-Mog. You know, to prove they’re human and everything.

“But  _ why _ is that a thing? I mean do people really eat that?” 

Cor motions to the long line forming outside of that instant death stand. “Speaks for itself, doesn’t it?”

Nyx shakes his head and walks past it without a second glance, pulling Prompto along by the collar to stop him from even considering it. “I’ll never understand your weird Insomnia customs.”

“Didn’t you have stuff like this in Galahd?” Prompto asks, holding his camera up to his face to snap a few photos of the vibrant tents that were scattered around the open streets.

“Not like  _ this _ . We had parties and celebrations, but we all pitched in to hunt the meat we’d be eating. And it was more of a community effort. We made skewers and stews, nothing was...deep fried or covered in cheese. It was all natural,” he says and he can’t resist the urge to shiver.

“You really shouldn’t knock it until you try it,” Cor mutters, which brings Nyx to a complete stop.

“Are you telling me that  _ the _ Cor, Legendary Cor, Cor the Immortal, has tried one of those abominations?”

Cor shrugs and Prompto doesn’t give anything anyway other than a mischievous little smirk which looks so wrong on his innocent little face. Nyx remembers when that face was about 3 times smaller and chubbier and he could barely even say Nyx’s name. But Nyx can also remember a time when the two of them would sit and listen to him reminisce about his homeland or humor him while he braided his hair every morning and wove in his prayers and beads.

Nyx has lived in Insomnia for ten years now, so maybe it was time to engage in some of Insomnia’s more...obscure customs.

With his back straightened and his shoulders squared, Nyx steps past his boyfriend and his son to get in line for what his future autopsy will rule as the cause of death. Prompto is beside himself with joy, snapping pictures of Nyx like a trigger happy mother in front of a toddler with a cute hat, and Cor looks as amused as his stupidly handsome face can get so even if Nyx does die today, it would be well worth it. Probably.

An annoyingly long amount of time later, Nyx is finally in possession of a deep fried, cheese covered peanut butter and jelly sandwich. It’s in one those red and white checkered cardboard boats, wrapped with a single layer of parchment paper that is already soaked to the nines in oil. 

Nyx feels queasy.

“Well, bottoms up, I guess,” he says with a deep suffering sigh before cutting off a piece with his plastic fork and stuffing the bite in his mouth. Cor and Prompto are both watching him with twin expressions of curiosity and Nyx chews and chews before blinking in amazement. “It’s actually not that—”

He pauses and then in the next second he’s spitting the bite out into the trash can he's conveniently parked himself next to. His mouth feels disgustingly coated in a thick layer of oil and the cheese and peanut butter and jelly combination has created what can only be described as the black miasma that spouts out of the ground when a daemon manifests.

Prompto cackles and even Cor is chuckling at his expense and Nyx has decided he is officially single and childless now.

“I can’t believe you actually ate that!” Prompto says in disbelief through his giggles.

Nyx gags, wiping at his tongue with the handful of flimsy napkins he remembered to get. It doesn’t feel like it’s wiping the feeling out of his mouth at all and now he just has bits of napkin mingled with the rest of it.

Cor offers him a bottle of water and Nyx gratefully takes it, taking a swig and swishing it around in his mouth a few times to no avail. He’s pretty sure nothing short of mouthwash could work.

When Prompto’s words finally click though, Nyx frowns. “You mean you’ve never actually eaten this? Either of you?” he asks, waving the empty water bottle between the two of them.

Cor smirks. “Gods no, that stuff can kill you, Nyx.”

Nyx’s grip tightens on his water bottle until the lid is threatening to pop off from the force. “You have about 5 seconds to run,” he says quietly. Well, not only is Nyx single and childless now, but he’s also about to be on the run for a double homicide.


End file.
